HEY, VOTE FOR ME, BECAUSE THAT OTHER GUY...
WELL, HE'S A ... HE's ... A JERK, YOU FOOL !!
I spent a good part of a recent Saturday in a recording studio, going through old archived political commercials I'd recorded over the past several years, in order to
assemble a demo to snag some of this year's ego-driven political wannabees. With heartfelt thanks to my studio-owner friend, we sifted through a body of work which, at the time
they were recorded, seemed very appropriate campaign banter, yet now..."after further review" ... what the heck was I doing or saying at the time???
It seems in the past couple of years, I've accused (well...my voice ... has accused) various political opponents of...
• Being a deadbeat dad (Georgia Congressional race),
• Robbing Aunt Sally in Pecos of her Social Security check to use for home district graft (Texas Congressional race),
• Being a 'hack' insurance lawyer (an Attorney General's race, let's just say, somewhere nearby),
• And, being a "near" convicted felon. "Near", mind you. Hmmm.
How in the world did these degenerates get on the ballot in the first place???
WELCOME TO ANOTHER POLITICAL AUTUMN
Tradition says... (and you remember Tradition, of course)... that for November elections in an 'even-numbered' year, radio and television ads for statewide and district
races start around Labor Day. Maybe a tad earlier if you've got the buck$. Three weeks of nice touchy-feely "good guy" ads... followed by three weeks of "He slept with your
mother..." attack adds... then closed out with two more weeks of disgustingly sweet "I'm a Boy Scout..." ads. Simple. Clean. Easy. Just another election season, eh?
Au Contraire, Hercule Poirot....
Labor Day is a l-o-n-g way off, in political terms, yet already we're seeing TONS of ads, which incidentally haven't affected the polls one iota. I've lost track of
who's who, myself...and I'm in the darned business! Now, granted, we've got some GaZillionAires in Texas who just flat-out want to be elected. And, they're used to "buying" what
they want. Imagine with me for a moment the Monday morning staff meeting in Billionaire Bob's campaign: "...well, let's see, we "bought" (out) El Paso and Austin LAST
week...let's buy (out) Houston and San Antonio THIS week. What? Marble Falls? Well, now Billy-John, who the hell cares about Marble Falls. Get Real, Billy-John !!"
But for every MegaBuck candidate, we've got for the most part a ton of decent folk seeking office... filling the ballot with names of wannabees, all the way down to your
local Precinct Chairman of the FooFoo Party. And if you see them at all, it won't be in the already saturated "prime" time (bought-out by the GaZillionAires), but rather in the
Perry Mason middle-of-the-night re-runs, along with the "dating service" ads, and "Bell Bottom Hits". Bet you've figured out when I write these Pulitzer winning essays.
Oh, I forgot to mention. Most of these ads we've already seen and heard are on television. But, what ever happened to political ads on the radio? To which I say, "Radio? What
radio?"
HAVE A GOOD WEEK, EVERYONE...
...OOPS, THEY'RE CALLING...GOTTA' GET BACK IN THE STUDIO !!
O'C
